Pregnancy After Loss Awareness Month: Navigating the Emotional Journey of Pregnancy After Loss
- Ryanne Schaad
- Mar 20
- 8 min read
March is Pregnancy After Loss Awareness Month, a dedicated time to recognize and support those navigating the complicated emotional journey of pregnancy following a miscarriage, stillbirth, or other perinatal loss. It is also a time that raises awareness, reduces stigma, and helps parents find resources and support to navigate their emotional journey.
Understanding Pregnancy After Loss: Emotional Challenges and Statistics
In the United States, 1 in 4 pregnancies ends in miscarriage and 1 in 160 pregnancies ends in stillbirth. Among women who have experienced perinatal loss, 50-80% become pregnant again within 12-18 months after their loss. This month we are looking to spread awareness about the challenges that parents face as they navigate pregnancy and parenting after loss. Pregnancy after loss can be an emotionally challenging experience, as parents try to navigate mixed emotions of grief, fear, and hope, making emotional support essential.
The Impact of Pregnancy After Loss on Mental Health
Parents experiencing pregnancy after loss often experience a range of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
Common Thoughts Parents Experience During Pregnancy After Loss
The cognitive load of pregnancy after loss can be overwhelming, and parents can experience thoughts such as:
“I can’t get excited about this baby.”
“What if this baby dies too?”
“I’m constantly going to the bathroom to check.”
“How will I get through the ultrasound scan?”
“Everyone expects me to be happy now.”
The Emotional Impact of Pregnancy After Loss
Parents experiencing pregnancy after loss often experience a range of emotions, from overwhelming anxiety and fear to a deep sense of joy. It’s normal to feel a variety of emotions, and these emotions often fluctuate and change throughout the pregnancy. For example, some parents may find that emotions such as fear and worry are particularly intense during the early stages of pregnancy and lessen as the pregnancy progresses. Emotions that parents might experience include:
Grief of Loss During a New Pregnancy:
The grief of a previous loss can sometimes intensify during a new pregnancy.
Fear and Anxiety of Experiencing Another Loss:
One of the most common emotions experienced by parents during pregnancy after loss is the fear of experiencing another loss. This fear can sometimes overshadow the early stages of pregnancy, making it difficult for parents to celebrate their growing family.
Feelings of Worry:
While parents may find comfort in the idea of being pregnant again, for some parents, the weight of their previous loss may intensify and bring about worry.
Feelings of Guilt:
Unfortunately, it’s not uncommon for parents to also experience feelings of guilt related to fear of forgetting their lost baby or feeling disconnected from the emotional experience of their new pregnancy.
Decreased Confidence in the Body:
Women may struggle to have confidence in their bodies and their ability to carry a pregnancy, especially when physical symptoms like cramping or spotting occur. They may experience an internal battle between hoping for the best and preparing for the worst.
Feelings of Isolation:
Parents may also feel isolated in their experience. The fear of experiencing another loss can increase feelings of isolation, as parents may not feel comfortable sharing their feelings with others and end up coping with their feelings on their own.
Feelings of Hope:
Parents may find that pregnancy after loss can also bring about a sense of hope.
Feelings of Joy:
Some parents may find that pregnancy after loss has a positive effect on their mental health, as they are able to fulfill their desire to grow their family.
Common Behavioral Changes During Pregnancy After Loss
Parents may also notice changes in their behavior, such as:
Increased Need for Reassurance:
Some parents may feel a strong need for reassurance throughout the pregnancy. This may manifest in frequent doctor visits, ultrasounds, or monitoring of symptoms to make sure that the pregnancy is progressing well. These behaviors are often driven by a fear of experiencing another loss and a need to make sure that the pregnancy will have a positive outcome.
Increased Vigilance and Caution:
Increased vigilance is common. Parents may find themselves living on high alert, constantly checking for signs of blood or spotting, and fearing any abnormal sensations or changes in their bodies. They may even check due dates and future milestones while still keeping their expectations low, to protect themselves from getting their hopes up.
Attachment Challenges to the New Pregnancy:
Attaching to the pregnancy can also be challenging for parents. The fear of another loss may make it difficult to fully connect with the pregnancy, as some parents may hold back emotionally and not want to fully attach to the pregnancy until they are more certain that they’ll have a positive outcome.
Avoiding Announcing the Pregnancy:
Many parents struggle with when—or even if—to tell others about the pregnancy. The fear of the pregnancy ending in loss again may lead them to delay sharing the news. This can create an internal conflict for some parents, as they struggle between wanting support and wanting to avoid potential heartbreak and disappointment.
Coping Strategies for Pregnancy After Loss: Ways to Cultivate Hope and Resilience
Each parent’s journey of coping with pregnancy after loss is different. Finding effective coping strategies can help parents start to process and navigate the complicated thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that can arise.
Be Kind to Yourself: Acknowledge and Honor Your Emotions:
It's important to allow yourself to feel the full range of emotions without judgment. Some parents may find that journaling can provide a helpful outlet to express the different emotions they experience. Organizations such as the Miscarriage Association provide free journaling prompts to help parents log the thoughts and feelings they experience throughout their pregnancy after loss journey.
Honor Your Previous Loss Through Meaningful Actions:
Once parents find out they are pregnant, the weight of grief may still linger and it can be challenging for them to fully embrace and celebrate their new pregnancy. Parents may find that finding ways to continue honoring their loss is helpful. Creating a memory box, engaging in creative activities (like writing poetry or creating art), planting flowers or a tree in your garden, or lighting a candle on anniversaries and other special days are some ways parents can honor their loss. While some parents may find marking the loss to be helpful, others may not - and that’s okay. There are no right or wrong ways to cope with a loss.
Lean on Your Support System:
Staying connected to your support system is vital. Let trusted friends and family know how they can support you.
Connect With Others Who Have Experienced Pregnancy After Loss:
Connecting with other parents who have experienced pregnancy after loss can help reduce feelings of isolation. Some parents find that joining a support group and sharing their experiences with other parents who have gone through similar experiences can be reassuring and validating. Organizations such as Postpartum Support International have free weekly online support groups that focus on pregnancy after loss and parenting after loss. Additionally, parents may also find listening to podcast episodes, such as The Worst Girl Gang Ever, that feature personal experiences of pregnancy after loss to be helpful in making them feel less alone.
Remember to Engage in Daily Self-Care Practices to Support Emotional Well-Being:
Pregnancy after loss can be an emotionally taxing time for parents. Whether it’s taking a relaxing bath, going for a walk, cooking your favorite meal, or taking time to rest - make sure to set aside time each day to take care of yourself.
Seek Professional Mental Health Support:
For some parents, the difficult emotions that can come with pregnancy after loss can lead to mental health problems, such as depression and anxiety. If you find that mental health symptoms are interfering with your daily functioning or persist for several weeks, you may benefit from meeting with a mental health professional.
At Ebb & Flow Psychological Associates, we understand the profound impact of pregnancy after loss and the emotional highs and lows that come along with it. You don’t have to navigate this journey alone. Our compassionate team of therapists specializes in grief, trauma, and reproductive mental health, providing a safe space for you to process your emotions and find healing at your own pace. If you’re ready to seek support, reach out today to learn how we can help.
Parenting After Pregnancy Loss: Explaining Pregnancy Loss to Siblings
The birth of a “rainbow baby,” a child born after a loss, is a complex and emotional journey. As parents balance the love they have for their new baby while also remembering and honoring the baby they lost, they may find it helpful to explain to their new child the baby that came before them and why the family continues to honor them. Many parents find that children’s books are a great tool when having age-appropriate conversations about grief and loss with their children. Books such as A Rainbow Baby Story: The Rainbow After the Storm, You Are My Rainbow, Someone Came Before You, and Perfectly Imperfect Family use simple, child-friendly language to help explain family life after loss.
How Friends and Family Can Support Someone Experiencing Pregnancy After Loss
Friends and family might wonder how to best support a loved one who is experiencing pregnancy after loss. It’s important for family and friends to know that navigating pregnancy after loss is a challenging emotional journey that requires patience, understanding, and support. Here are things to keep in mind:
Things to Avoid Saying to Someone Who is Experiencing Pregnancy After Loss:
"At least you’re pregnant again."
"You’re worrying too much - this is the pregnancy you hoped for."
"This pregnancy will be fine, stop worrying so much."
Helpful Things to Say and Do for Someone Experiencing Pregnancy After Loss:
"How are you feeling?"
"If you need anything—whether it’s someone to talk to or just to sit with—I’m here."
"I’m thinking of you and your baby every day."
Offer practical support, like making meals, helping with household chores, and offering to attend appointments as their support person
Remember that pregnancy after loss can bring emotional highs and lows - being supportive, caring, and a good listener are some of the best ways to support loved ones.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) About Pregnancy After Loss
When is Pregnancy After Loss Awareness Month?
Pregnancy After Loss Awareness Month takes place every March.
How can I manage anxiety during pregnancy after loss?
Is it normal to feel guilty about being happy during pregnancy after loss?
What should I say to someone who lost a baby during pregnancy?
How can I navigate pregnancy after loss?
How Ebb & Flow Psychological Associates Can Help with Pregnancy After Loss
Navigating pregnancy after loss can be profoundly emotional, but you don’t have to face it alone. At Ebb & Flow Psychological Associates, our compassionate and experienced therapists offer specialized support in grief, trauma, and reproductive mental health. We provide a safe, understanding environment to help you process your emotions, find resilience, and move toward healing. If you're ready for support, contact us today—we’re here to help you every step of the way.
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